Grissom's Clarity
by greyknightwench
Summary: It's all clear to Grissom now. [GSR]
1. Invitation

Disclaimer: None of the characters or settings in this story are mine. The powers that be haven't given me permission to play with their characters yet, sadly.

Spoliers: "Play With Fire" Season 3

Setting: Current day…sometime during the 5th season after "Firestarter."

Grissom's Clarity

The lights from the squad cars were intense as they shone onto the crime scene. The black sky was punctuated by millions of stars as Grissom and Sara crouched next to a decomposing body. The light breeze dropped the temperature in the desert so much that many of the officers on hand were sitting in their cruisers, sipping on their coffee.

"Looks like a gunshot wound to the back, between the shoulder blades," Sara said, pointing her flashlight at the bloody wound.

"Hmm." Grissom mumbled absently.

Sara wondered at Grissom's lack of enthusiasm. He was distant, staring at a point far on the horizon, distracted. Frowning, she refocused on the body.

"There's no wallet, no money, no keys. I'd say this is robbery that went south." She continued and when she was greeted by more silence she laid a hand on his back. "Grissom?"

Grissom snapped his head around and fixed his gaze on her. His bright blue eyes bore into her and she had to fight the shudder that threatened to shake her whole body.

He darted a glance at her outstretched arm, before returning his eyes to her face. "I have to go. I'm going to ask David to drive you back to the lab. I'm sure you can take care of the evidence collection…you seem to have a handle on the case."

Sara dropped her hand from his back. "I don't understand. Where are you going?"

He wouldn't look at her, wouldn't answer her question. "I can't do this anymore." He whispered.

Without a word of explanation he strode off to the Denali. She stood and called after him, but he ignored her. Only stopping long enough to say something to David who had just arrived. And just like that, he was speeding away into the Vegas night.

"What the hell?" Sara asked herself as David made his way to her.

* * *

Grissom sat in the last car of the New York, New York rollercoaster and rubbed the bridge of his nose. Rollercoasters had always been able to help him think, help him sort out whatever he was feeling, but tonight he received no peace of mind, no clarity from the rumbling hulk of steel. He had ridden the rollercoaster four times already and he was nowhere near resolving his dilemma.

Sara Sidle had always been either on his mind or in his self-conscious, whispering to him to let go. Let go of all his inhibitions and just be, and as much as he desired to do just that, he knew that he never could. Until tonight.

The crime scene hadn't been any different than most of the crime scenes that the CSI division had seen. In fact nothing about tonight had been any different, except that somewhere along the line Grissom had come to the conclusion that he wanted Sara. He wanted her no matter what it cost him. It scared him to death to know that he would risk everything he had just to be with her, even for a fleeting moment. So his instinct kicked in. He ran. He left her at the crime scene and came to the one place that always made sense to him. The one place that didn't demand an answer, didn't get mad if he was silent. But tonight that place didn't offer what it used to and he finally understood why.

Sara wasn't with him.

It made him uncomfortable to know that he could never enjoy something like riding roller coasters again unless Sara was sitting in the seat next to him. He'd always been alone, always been self-sustaining, until now.

He'd been running for so long, running from commitment, running from his feelings. He just wanted to stop. But he was terrified that if he did stop he would never get going again.

Did he really want to start running again? He asked himself that question repeatedly as heambled back to the parking lot and his Mercedes. As he sat behind the steering wheel looking out at the bright, blinking lights of the city, he finally understood.

Starting theblack Mercedes up, he pulled out of the parking lot and headed back to work.

* * *

Sara sat in the layout room, softly singing to herself as she looked over crime scene photographs.

"I've got a crummy job  
It don't pay near enough  
To buy the things it takes  
To win me some of your love  
Every time I turn around  
I'm looking up, you're looking down  
Maybe something's wrong with you  
That makes you act the way you do  
Maybe I am crazy too"

She didn't notice Grissom come into the layout room. She was too engrossed in the photos and the song she was singing.

"'Soak up the Sun' by Cheryl Crow. Nice rendition." he commented.

She smiled to herself before turning around. "Where did you run off to earlier?"

He thought about that for a moment. Should he tell her the truth? "New York."

She looked confused for a moment, before realization dawned on her. "Oh, roller coaster therapy."

"An attempt to find some clarity." Grissom added.

"Did you find it?" she asked as she started gathering her photographs.

"I think so." Grissom replied.

Sara was silent as she put the glossy photos back in the file folder. She almost didn't hear what he said next.

"I need you Sara." Grissom whispered.

"Excuse me?"

Grissom could feel his panic rising as she stared at him, waiting for him to clarify. It was now or never. He had been going over and over how he would ask her, what he would say. His palms were sweaty as he looked up at her.

"Sara…will you…have dinner with me…tonight?" he waited as Sara's features broke into a wide grin.

Surprised, all she could do was stare at him.

Grissom squirmed and looked unsure of himself as people hurried back and forth in the hallway outside.

Sara snapped out of her deer in the headlights stare. "Uh…sorry. I wasn't expecting that."

"I know Sara. I'm sorry for that." he said as he flipped his phone open and closed.

Sara enjoyed his discomfort. Now maybe he would understand how she had felt when she stood before him asking the same question almost two years ago.

"I'd like that Grissom. Do you want to meet somewhere or…" Sara asked.

"I'll pick you up."

"Okay. What time?"

"Seven?"

"Seven it is."

Sara's smile reached from ear to ear as she followed Grissom out of the layout room and into the hallway. If people noticed her smile that wouldn't fade, nobody said anything.

She hummed to herself on the way to ballistics. Now her only question was what to wear.

A/N: A huge thanks to my awesome beta, Danie.

Please review if you read. I'd like to know if you enjoyed it or not.


	2. Dinner

Sara was walking into her living room after finally being satisfied with her appearance when she heard the knock on her door. She suddenly felt her confidence from earlier start to wane. Her heart started beating faster, her thoughts a complete jumble. She couldn't remember ever feeling so nervous. Taking one last glance at herself in the small mirror on her refrigerator, she reached out and opened the door.

Her breath caught in her throat at the sight of him. Grissom stood on her porch wearing a black suit with a stark white shirt, not quite buttoned at the top. It looked like it would have been a tux except that he didn't have a bowtie. His hair was short and neatly cropped, his beard trimmed. In his hand he held a single yellow rose.

For a moment neither of them said anything, as they took in each other's appearance.

She was glad she'd chosen to wear the maroon cocktail dress, which clung to her curves without looking too inviting, giving her a classy yet sexy appearance. She smiled a little, mentally congratulating herself. She had chosen this dress in the event that Grissom might just be asking her to a "friendly" dinner. In this dress she doubted it would stay friendly.

Finding her voice, Sara said softly, "You look great Grissom."

He blinked several times before responding. "Sara, you…you're beautiful." He held out the flower to her.

"Thank you." She said as she took the rose and grabbed her small black purse from the kitchen counter.

"You're welcome." Grissom replied. "Are you ready?"

"Yes I am." She said as she reached in her purse for her house keys.

Grissom offered her his arm as she closed and locked the door.

Her legs felt wobbly as she walked down the stairs. She gripped the handrail with one hand, her other gripped his arm.

"You okay?" he asked with concern.

"Yeah. I'm just not used to heels."

"Well you look great in them."

Sara smiled as she got used to the awkward rhythm. If they made her legs look longer and got Grissom's attention, they were worth the pain and awkwardness.

When they got to the parking lot she expected to see his car or maybe one of the Denalis, she didn't expect to see a stretch black limo, lights on, door open waiting for them.

"Wow." Sara stared at the limo, her mouth open, her eyes wide.

Grissom just grinned and placed his hand on the small of her back, gently leading her to the passenger door.

Sara felt the heat of his hand on her bare flesh and mentally thanked her inner stylist for picking an open back dress. His touch was doing wonderful things to her already frayed nerve endings.

"So when are you going to tell me where we are going?" she asked as she settled into the plush interior.

Grissom sat next to her and replied, "All in good time."

The ride through the streets of Vegas was a silent affair. No words needed to be spoken as they sat together in the back of the luxurious limousine, both enjoying the nearness of each other.

Grissom had moved a little closer to Sara in the process of settling in, his thigh now touching hers. He wanted to reach out and touch her, lay his hand on her exposed knee, but every time he raised his hand to do so, he would pull it back, unsure of how she would respond. He didn't want to come across as moving too fast.

Gil never thought this evening would happen. He feared that he had made one too many mistakes, pushed her away one too many times. He had expected her to refuse his invitation to dinner, telling him he was too late, but she didn't and now here she was.

Staring out the window at the passing lights, she was heaven. Her long brown hair was hanging down past her shoulders, curled just the way he loved it, reminding him of that day years ago when he first met her. It seemed so long ago, when her hand was waving eagerly from the front row. Her eyes full of questions, her smile infectious as it brightened the room.

He smiled to himself as he remembered her smile, the one that seemed to appear when he really needed it. The many times that Conrad would drive him to the brink, all he needed was to see her smile. The case where he couldn't find the body that he knew was there, she had come out on the back porch to check on him, wipe plaster from his face and smile when he vented his frustrations.

She turned her head and smiled at him again. He felt his heart stop beating for a split second. In that moment he knew. He knew what do to about 'this'. And nothing would stop him this time. Not work, not his insecure mind, nor his fearful heart. He smiled back as the limousine pulled up to the Bellagio.

Sara had never been inside the Bellagio unless it was to work a case. The interior was classy and elegant. Light colors and flower bouquets adorned the walls. Plush, cream colored sofas and chairs were clustered in the lobby. Down the middle of the spacious entrance hall there was a row of slot machines, their metallic symphonies ringing in time with the winners joyous shrieks.

Grissom slowly led her through the maze of people until they reached what she assumed was their destination.

"Light" nightclub was one of the most exclusive nightclubs in Vegas. The waiting list was as bad or worse than some of the more trendy clubs in Hollywood and New York. Most nights it featured Jazz artists from all over the world. The interior was dim, decorated in dark earth tones.

Sara stared in awe at the stage and small tables set up around it. Each table had flowers, glasses and candles sitting atop maroon tables cloths. There was a band set up on the stage next to the bar. The sounds of instruments being tuned added to the atmosphere.

The hostess led them to a small table set in a shadowed alcove, a red "reserved" sign sitting on it.

"Well I am impressed. This place is beautiful." Sara commented as she sat on the coffee colored booth.

Grissom slipped the hostess a twenty dollar bill and settled into his booth. "I'm glad you like it. I had a friend who owed me a favor."

"You really do look handsome tonight. This light brings out your eyes." She said, not being able to help herself.

Grissom fidgeted and picked up the wine menu. "Thank you."

Sara smiled. He was even cuter when he was embarrassed.

She was perusing the small menu when he spoke in a soft tone.

"I'm really glad you're here tonight Sara." He said as he set the wine list down. "I thought you'd say no."

She noticed how he fidgeted with the corner of the menu when he said the last part, like he couldn't believe she was here with him.

"Grissom, can I ask you something?"

He looked up, a small smile starting at the corner of his mouth. "If you call me Gil."

Smiling, Sara twirled her glass of water. "Why did you ask me to dinner?"

His smile faltered, his expression turning contemplative.

"There are a few reasons."

Sara wasn't sure if that was the answer she expected or not. She stayed silent hoping he would elaborate, yet at the same time knowing he wouldn't.

He looked at her, his mouth falling open as if he was about to reveal his reasons. The waiter took that moment to ask if they wanted anything to drink.

Grissom ordered a Long Island Iced Tea and gestured to Sara.

"I'll take a glass of your house wine please."

The waiter left with their drink orders, leaving the both of them in silence.

"You know I always pegged you for a scotch kind of guy."

"There's a lot about me that may surprise you Sara." Grissom said, staring at her from behind his glasses.

Sara felt a chill go down her spine at his tone of voice and the heat in his gaze. She twisted her napkin in her hands to hide the fact they were shaking. She couldn't believe that she was finally on a date with Gil Grissom. The man she had worked with for nearly six years, the man she had left San Francisco for, the man she had slowly fallen for. The more she thought about it, the more she feared she was reading too much into all of this. Granted the limo, rose and intimate dinner just screamed "more than friends", but Sara was used to over thinking things when it came to the enigmatic man sitting across from her.

Her inner musings were disturbed by his soft laugh.

"What?" she asked.

"You really want to know don't you?"

"I'm just always assuming way too much when it comes to you. I don't want to presume that this is more than a friendly dinner if it's not." Sara said, at once wondering what had possessed her to say all of that.

For the second time that night the waiter decided to take the opportunity to interrupt by bringing their drinks. He was defiantly not getting a tip.

After the waiter left, Sara took a sip of the red wine and noticed Grissoms's amused expression.

"You look about ready to kill the waiter."

Sara's only response was a wry grin.

"Sara, this dinner…it's not just a 'friendly dinner'." Grissom said before taking a sip of his drink.

Ignoring the completely juvenile urge to squeal with delight, she decided to just wait and let him fully explain himself.

"I've come to a few realizations in the last twenty four hours. One of those is that I can't go on living like I've been living anymore. I go home every night and look over old case files, never grasping the fact that my home feels empty." The words seemed to come to him easier than they ever had. "I used to think that all I'd ever need was work. I let it conceal the fact that I was…lonely."

Sara sat back in shock. This was the most she had ever heard from him in regards to his feelings. She took a sip of her wine, a lack of anything to say causing her to become voiceless.

"I realize I have made so many mistakes when it has come to relationships. I just didn't want to ruin something that didn't have a chance to start." Grissom said, taking another sip of his drink.

Sara sighed and set her wine glass down. "What makes you think you would ruin it?"

Removing his glasses and pinching the bridge of his nose, he sighed wearily. "I'm pushing fifty Sara. You have so many opportunities ahead of you. I always thought I would be a hindrance."

"When are you going to recognize that I don't see you as a nearly fifty year old man?" She asked, reaching across the table, lightly laying her hand atop of his.

"What do you see me as then?"

"I see you as someone who deeply intrigues me, someone who I want to know better. I don't see your age, I see you." Sara couldn't believe they were having this conversation.

His hand felt warm and smooth under hers, making her wish they were someplace a little more private. Thinking of somewhere like that caused her to remember the state her room was in at the moment. She had torn through her wardrobe trying to find something to wear and now there were clothes strewn all over the place.

"Are you hungry? His voice and his hand curling around her own brought her back to the present.

She was hungry for something, but she doubted that the menu had what she wanted.

"Not really."

"Me either."

They stared at each other for what seemed like an eternity until a voice broke the relative silence to announce a special guest.

"Ladies and gentlemen, tonight we have a special guest. Marc Cohn."

The announcer stepped aside as an older man with a black acoustic guitar took the stage.

Sara didn't even notice Grissom stand up until he was right next to her, holding his hand out.

"Dance with me?"


	3. Dance

It started chaste, as do most things. But what started innocent quickly turned into something much more.

The minute he felt her warm hand enveloping his as he led her to the dance floor he was lost. At first he held her at arms length, one hand clasped with hers, his other hand on the small of her back. The music started, the singers voice beginning a melodic verse.

"_I want to be a man of the world._

_Blood in my veins and a hurt in my heart."_

The slow pace that was set was just fine with Grissom. He didn't want to rush this perfect opportunity to hold Sara in his arms.

"_Hide in the street with the noise and the dirt._

_And the one still looking for a brand new start." _

The words of the song seemed to speak to him, telling the whole room what his feelings were. He found himself pulling her closer to him, his hand on her back traveling up and down in lazy strokes. The distance seemed to be too much for Sara as well. Her hand that was on his shoulder leisurely slid to the back of his neck, softly caressing his nape.

As the song continued Grissom detached his hand from hers and placed both his hands on her hips. Her arms wound around his neck, her head resting on his shoulder.

"_Oh I've been sleeping far too long_

_Hiding out in the palace of gold_

_Show me one thing before I'm gone_

_It can't be bought, it can't be sold."_

"This feels nice," she murmured as her fingers played with the curls at his neckline.

He sighed, wrapping his arms around her completely. As the song reached its crescendo, the singers voice getting louder, something shifted.

"_Show me how to come alive._

_Show me how to make you mine."_

All of the sudden just holding her wasn't enough. His hands began to slide over her soft skin, his fingers kneading her heated flesh.

Sara groaned as she pulled her head back. Their faces were mere inches apart.

"_Cause if you'd only be my girl."_

The room seemed to dissolve around them as Grissom leaned closer, his lips brushing against her ear.

"Come home with me. Stay the night," he whispered.

Bringing her hand to stroke his bearded face, she smiled. "I thought you'd never ask."

Her hand on his skin made him do what he had always wanted to do.

On the crowded dance floor, for everybody to see and as the final note played…he kissed her.

"_I could be a man of the world."_

She responded immediately, pressing herself against him, tugging at his curly hair as her lips moved against his. He was lightheaded; the room seemed to be spinning as he snuck his tongue into her eager mouth. The kiss was more than he thought it ever could be. All his desires, his pent up lust and emotion he was scared to analyze came to the surface in the few heated moments he spent with Sara's excited lips pressed against his.

He pulled away reluctantly, pressing his forehead to hers.

"Sara…we should go."

"Yes, we should."

Grasping her hand he led her to the bar and after paying the bill escorted her to the parking lot. Within moments the limo pulled up, the driver getting out and opening the door.

As she got in, he looked to the remarkably clear sky and silently thanked whoever was up there.

The ride back to Grissom's townhouse wasn't awkward, but it wasn't comfortable either. The air was filled with the kind of nervous tension that you feel when something you've wanted for so long is finally about to happen. Sara linked her arm through his and leaned her head on his shoulder.

"Have you enjoyed the evening so far?" He asked in that slow drawl that never failed to make her tingle in all the right places.

"Very much so, thank you."

"Are you tired?"

That voice again, this time even lower.

She met his gaze then moved her lips to his ear. "Not in the slightest."

He smiled that lazy smile and reached up, brushing an errant lock of hair from her face. "Good."

That one word, combined with the look in his lust filled eyes was enough to make her shiver.

He was pulling her closer to him, his lips parting, his eyes closing when his cell phone rang. With an audible groan he yanked it out of his pocket and flipped it open.

"Grissom." He growled into the receiver.

Sara smiled.

"I can't believe you're calling me for this…no Sofia…no I'm not coming in. I already told you I'm taking the night off…" Grissom was sounding more irate by the minute and it made Sara wonder just what Sophia would be calling him about. Maybe they found a body riddled with bugs.

Other darker thoughts came into her head at the thought of Sophia calling him but she quickly pushed them away. Sophia wasn't in the limo with him and Sophia wasn't the one who shared a soul-shaking kiss earlier.

Again, Sara smiled.

"Sophia, I shouldn't have to tell you how to process a crime scene, you have Greg and Brass. Call HAZMAT, and process the evidence…I'm sure you can handle it Sophia…I will, thank you." And with that he shut the phone.

"Do I want to know?" she asked, toying with his sleeve cuff.

"Lets just say it involves a dead body, a port-a-potty, and Sophia Curtis acting like a clueless rookie." He sighed. "Where were we?"

"Well I could answer that with words or with actions," Sara whispered as he put his phone back in his pocket.

"Actions speak louder than words."

His voice caressed her ragged nerves as he leaned closer to her. With more courage than she thought she had, she laid her hand on his thigh, comforted by the masculine heat radiating into her palm.

He looked down at her hand and sucked in a breath. For a moment she thought maybe she had done something wrong. She started to withdraw her hand but he stopped her with his soft, yet strong grip. Bringing her hand to his lips he placed a kiss on her palm, his eyes never leaving hers. The depth of emotion and intensity in his quiet blue eyes caused her to bite back a moan.

The limo had stopped in front of Grissom's townhouse, the driver getting out, opening their door.

"Are you sure about this Sara?" he asked in a hushed yet hopeful voice.

"I'm surprised you have to ask," she responded.

He waited a moment after the door was opened. "I have to know now Sara, because once we go through that door…there's no turning back."

Sara looked at him and realized words would never be able to convince him. Bringing her hands to cup his face, she leaned in and kissed him, putting everything she wanted to say into it.

When she pulled back with a smile on her face, his expression changed. Where once he seemed cautious yet eager, now he looked determined. His eyes had darkened, his mouth curved in the barest hint of a smile.

Sliding out of the limo. He slipped the driver a fifty-dollar tip and led Sara to the front door of his town home, her hand still clasped in his.

The tension built as he reached into his pants pocket for his keys and by the time he got the right key in the lock, his hand was shaking.

Sara's breathing had become shallow, her heartbeat fast as the door opened. Grissom pulled her inside and kicked the door shut as he drew her to him. His arms wrapped around her as his soft lips landed on hers. He backed them up until her back was against the wall inside the entranceway. His hands were everywhere, on her hips and her stomach, her arms and her thighs. He hooked one hand under her knee and pulled her leg up as he attacked her mouth with his tongue.

By comparison her hands stayed in relatively one spot, his hair. She loved his silky grey curls and had always longed to tangle her fingers in it. One of his hands had snaked around to her back and the feel of his warm, strong hand on her bare skin made her gasp. Tearing her lips from his, she pulled his head back and trailed her lips to his throat. She could taste the saltiness of his skin as he ground his pelvis into her. The evidence of his attraction to her caused her to smile and writhe against him, eliciting a groan of frustration.

He brought his lips to her ear and gently nipped at her lobe. "I am so tempted to take you right here against this wall."

Sara shivered at the prospect. "So do it."

He pulled back looking into her eyes. "I don't want to rush this, we've waited so long."

As much as she appreciated and respected that sentiment, she couldn't agree with it.

"We don't have to rush anything. We've got plenty of time to take it slow. I've wanted you for so long, wanted to feel you inside me, riding me hard and deep. Please Gil."

"What about…"

"I get a shot every three months. I can never remember to take the damn pills," Sara said, answering his unspoken question.

He seemed to think it over for a moment until she arched her back and hooked her leg on the small of his back, bringing him even closer.

"Christ, Sara," he breathed as she reached down and undid his buckle.

She pulled his zipper down just as he was hiking her dress up, bunching it at her waist. When he slid his hand along her bare hip and realized she wasn't wearing any underwear he groaned and pressed his wet eager mouth to hers.

His kiss was desperate and hungry as he guided his swollen cock into her tight, wet opening. Bringing both of his hands to her ass, he gripped it hard and thrust home.

Sara wrenched her mouth away from his, the sensation of him buried so deep inside of her causing her to cry out.

Pulling out almost all the way, he brought his lips to her neck and sucked on her flesh as he thrust into her again.

"God yes Gil…Just like that…umm babe you feel so…shit…" Sara could barely form a coherent thought as Grissom fell into a deep, fast and hard rhythm.

Her back slid up and down the wall, her fingers once again tangled in his soft hair.

All the years of wanting him, all the years of going home thinking she would never be able to have him; they all seemed to fade away as he pumped his tumescent (tumid) member in and out of her.

"You feel so good Sara. Hot and tight. I'm gonna make you come so hard honey," he whispered causing Sara to tingle in all the right places.

"Are you going to come for me Sara? Hmm?" he asked, gripping the rounded globes of her ass even harder than before. "Will you clench around me as I explode inside you?"

His murmured words were almost enough by themselves to make her climax. She let her head fall back against the wall as she moaned his name.

Hearing his name like that seemed to set something off inside of him. He thrust into her harder and faster until all that could be heard besides their shallow breathing was the wet slap of skin smacking skin.

The sounds of his masculine grunts and whispered promises combined with his rock hard cock slamming into her caused a sensory overload. She felt it build from her abdomen and spread until whatever pressure was inside of her suddenly burst through her pores. For a moment all she could so was clench. Her legs clamped tight around his waist, her fingers dug into his scalp as the waves washed over her. She vaguely registered his body go rigid just before he let out a string of words she didn't know were in his vocabulary.

As she recovered, she let her head fall on his shoulder, a lazy smile on her flushed face.

"Damn Sara." Grissom said, his voice shaky. "That's not how I imagined our first time."

Sara had to smile a little at the idea of Gil imagining a first time between them. "This is exactly how I pictured my first time with you."

Gil pulled back and looked at her, his confusion and slight shock prevalent on his flushed face.

Sara let out a small chuckle. "Surprised?"

"A little."

"I've always wanted our first time to be wild and impulsive. You and I are so similar in the way we approach things we want. We run ahead at full steam until we get to where we want to go, but when we get there…we freeze up. The only way for it to ever work is to keep our foot on the accelerator."

Grissom smiled a little. "Apart from the fact you're making what we just did sound like the Indy 500, I have to agree with you." Slowly he stepped away from her, his hands resting on her hips. "As much as I concur with your opinion I must ask if we can go someplace…a little more comfortable."

"I've always wondered what your room looks like."

Grissom knew he had to slow down. They were almost to his bedroom when he stopped, pulling a confused Sara against him.

"I want to apologize about earlier," he said, putting his finger over her lips as she began to protest. "Please just accept that. I was impatient; I should have had more self-control. I should have been more adamant about going slow."

"Alright, I accept your apology, but you have to know I won't ever regret what happened," she said, eyeing the door to his bedroom with barely concealed curiosity.

Grissom smiled and leaned closer. "Let me make it up to you Sara," he whispered against her ear.

"Okay," she said, her voice low as a shiver ran through her.

"Wait here," he instructed as he left her and disappeared into his room.

As soon as he stepped into his room he relaxed somewhat. He realized that having her in a separate room allowed him to calm down, gather his thoughts as he rummaged in his closet for the items he had bought earlier.

He knew she would be surprised when she saw what he had in store for her. He never gave anyone the impression he was a romantic kind of guy, and the truth was he normally wasn't. Not until he met Sara. It was strange how one person could affect another so easily. Before she moved to Vegas he would never had thought to set up candles all around a room, or make up a CD full of Jazz greats like B.B King, Duke Ellington and a little Sade for good measure to play, setting the mood. In fact he usually scoffed at the mere idea of it, thinking that those things were romantic clichés that only served well in Hollywood movies and romance poems.

Strange how one woman could change his entire view of seduction.

After lighting the candles, putting the CD in the stereo and doing a quick scan of the room, making sure everything was in order, he opened the door.

Sara was standing near his kitchen, her back to him as she studied his collection of butterflies on the wall.

He stepped behind her, wrapping his arms around her mid-section.

"Close your eyes," he whispered.

She nodded and did so, turning around in the process.

He took her hand in his and began walking to his bedroom, the sound of B.B's guitar filling the charged air.

"I'm going to show you how I always pictured our first time together to be."

She nodded, licking her lips in anticipation.

Once inside the room he faced her and whispered, "Now open your eyes."

Her shocked gasp made him smile as she took in the full effect of the white candles that were situated throughout the room.

His normally cold, sterile feeling room now had a warm glow to it. His room was nothing to boast about, but it was good enough for him. A king size bed with black and blue satin sheets sitting on a metallic bed frame, two matching black nightstands and a dark oak dresser with a small stereo perched atop it were the only things in the room. It was really quite stark, but Grissom couldn't see adding any character to a place where you spent most of your time asleep…until now.

"Wow…nice room," Sara said.

Stepping behind her he nuzzled her neck as he replied, "Thank you."

She started to pull her dress up, intent on removing it, until his hand stopped her.

"Slowly, Sara. I'm going to take my time with you. Show you just how much I lo…want you," he murmured, catching himself before he said something that might scare her off. Hell admitting that out loud might just scare him off.

Instead of dwelling on the fact that he nearly told her he loved her, he decided to concentrate on…other things. Like the feel of Sara's skin under his hands as he slid them under the fabric of her dress, around her waist and finally settling them on her stomach.

Rubbing his thumbs along the underside of her breasts elicited a soft moan from her as she let her head fall back on his shoulder. He took to opportunity to press a soft yet eager kiss to her exposed throat. Her hands had reached up and behind his head, slowly toying with the damp curls at the nape of his neck. Her soft, cool hands on his skin caused him to let out his own soft groan as he slowly turned her around, backing her up until they were right beside his bed.

Slowly he bunched the dress up and pulled it over her head, dropping it to the floor in a small heap. Without taking his eyes from hers he unbuttoned his shirt and shrugged out of it. His white t-shirt was the next to go, his hungry gaze never straying from her. Reaching for her, he let his hands rest on her bare hips as her mouth sought his.

Unlike their kisses earlier, which were hungry and passionate in a hurried way, this one was slow, sensuous and full of a yearning that had been simmering just below the surface for years. Her lips were soft and warm against his, her tongue hot and confident as it tangled with his own.

Pushing softly, they both fell to the bed in a jumble of limbs already covered in a light sheen of warm sweat.

Her hands were at the waistband of his trousers, gently pushing them in a silent plea. He lifted his hips, letting her push them down far enough for him to kick them off. He raised himself up on his forearms and took in the sight before him.

Sara Sidle, naked on his bed, her hair fanned out under her. He took in her flushed face, parted lips and warm eyes.

Sighing he brought his hand up to brush an errant lock of hair from her face. "You are so beautiful Sara. Makes me realize how much of a fool I've been."

"It's in the past Gil. What matters is you're here now, with me," she said softly as her hands skimmed over his back, sending shock waves through his already tense body.

He crushed his mouth to hers again before trailing his lips south, over her jaw and across her collarbone before covering one rosy nipple.

She sucked in a breath as he swirled his tongue around the sensitive nub, his hands gripping her shoulders. Moving on to the other nipple he gave it the same attention before moving further down, pausing at her naval before hovering over her shaved mound. By the time he lowered his lips to her moist opening she was shivering, her stomach visibly clenching and relaxing.

He looked up as his tongue darted out to taste her slick folds to see her head moving from side to side, her hands clenching the sheets. Her eyes were shut tight, her mouth open.

Sliding his tongue over her swollen clitoris, he brought his hand to where his mouth was. Slowly he thrust one finger into her, then two as he sucked her tight bundle of nerves into his mouth. Her head came up, her back arching as she climaxed, clenching around his fingers. He made his way back up her body, kissing her heated skin as he went.

After removing his boxers he hovered over her as she relaxed, opening her eyes and smiling. Taking both her hands in his, he laced their fingers together and lowered his mouth to hers.

He groaned into her mouth when she wrapped her legs around his own, slightly lifting her hips off the bed in a plea that was unmistakable. Slowly he slid into her welcoming heat. They both sucked in their breath as their two bodies became one.

For a moment he stayed still, content to stay inside of her and relish the feeling. But after a while the urge to make her scream his name became too much. He pulled out and thrust back into her, setting up a lazy rhythm that had Sara whimpering under him.

She reached down and gripped his ass, pulling him into her hard. He looked down and the look in her eyes was enough to make him lose his sanity. Her normally warm eyes were now lit up with unrestrained passion.

Gripping her hands tighter he gave in and began slamming into her in earnest. Her soft moans became louder as he thrust hard and deep enough to make the bed beneath them screech in protest.

"God…Sara…. gonna…" He tried to hold off, tried to control himself, but when he felt her walls clamp down on him and heard her voice shouting his name he was powerless to resist. With a very uncharacteristic shout, he emptied himself into her and collapsed, trying desperately to catch his breath.

Sara wrapped her arms around his slick back, holding him to her as the shivers passed through him. He was barely aware of her soft lips on his shoulder or her legs tangled with his. All he knew for sure was that he never wanted to leave the bed so long as she was in it with him.

Raising his head up, he kissed her forehead and attempted to roll off of her.

"No," Sara protested, holding him closer. "I like it like this."

"I'm crushing you," he countered, sure that she couldn't possibly be comfortable.

"Mmm…no you're not. I love the feel of your warm body on mine."

Kissing her again, he laid his head on her shoulder and sighed. He could feel her breathing begin to even out, her arms going slack.

Pressing a feather light kiss to the skin on her small shoulder, he told her what he should have told her years ago. "I love you Sara," he whispered before falling into a comforting sleep.

She was already dreaming of next time.

The End.

A big thanx goes out to Dani. The best Beta a writer could ask for. She's been patient with me through all my annoying grammatical errors and always has something nice to say. Big Hug!


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